"Welcome Back, Ms. M!"

That's what my kids said this morning as they ran to me, beaming, and threw their arms around me.

"Did you have fun in Tuscaloosa? We're so glad you're back safely! What are we learning about today--I can't WAIT!"

OK, so not really. They were sure to tell me how lucky Alabama is, though, seeing as we won yet again with absolutely no talent.

"Alabama booty. They booty just like RMS. 'Cept RMS don't got no money, AND they booty. At least Alabama got lights on the field and don't have to stop at halftime just 'cause can't nobody see!"

Will greeted me at the door. "Ms. M, you was in my dream last night."

"Oh, really? Tell me about it."

"Well, it was time for school and I was walking down the hall but I was just going to socialize (like I always do) so I walked right past your room and you made eye contact with me like, "Get yo butt in here!" Just like you always do. And I kept walkin' past you anyways (just like I always do) then all the sudden BAM!! You was right in front of my like Superman or somethin' and you was grabbin' my collar and jerkin' me all the way down the hall!"

Is it odd that I'm flattered by this? Number one, it shows that I make enough of an impression on at least someone that his subconscious mind thinks about me, and two, it shows that that subconscious mind also sees me as somewhat of an authoritative figure.

Then again, last night I dreamt that David Beckham and I eloped, and I'm pretty sure that is based on no premise of reality whatsoever.

I take up Rashee's football today and he throws a fit. Cussing, accusing me of taking my feelings of bitterness (from the breakup) out on him, beating on the closet door that I locked it in...Minutes later, he's sitting at the front of the room (not doing his work).

"Rashee, you're lazy. That's all there is to it. Because you're smart and very capable but you REFUSE to do anything productive. Now how are you going to get that law degree making Cs in class? One of these days I'm going to be paying you the big bucks to get me out of legal trouble. But that's going to require more of you than just writing down three slides worth of notes!"

"Ms. M," he says softly, smiling now, "you don't get in any kind of trouble!" Then, louder: "I could NOT be a teacher. It is just NOT for me."

"Why?" I'm smiling too.

"Because I might have a bad student...you know, one like me. And I would PUNCH him in the face! BAM!!"

Last block, everyone kept making "black" comments. "Quit being so black and give me back my pencil! Get your black self over here! Shut up, black people!"

Finally, someone made the brilliant observation: "Shut up! We're ALL black in here!"

"Ahem," I said, raising my hand.

"Ohh, please, Ms. M. You basically one of us!"

WIth that being said, I'm going to get my black butt in bed. Wednesday is Veteran's Day, which means tomorrow is BASICALLY Friday. Woohoo!